Really real

Really real

Women apparently speak between 15 000 and 20 000 words per day.  This is far more than men, I’m lead to believe.  These words are spoken to strangers, colleagues, friends and family and yet how many of these words are really real?  How many reveal the true state of our hearts?  You see, as women, we often hold back from sharing our real fears, how overwhelmed we really feel by the challenges we face, how broken our hearts really are or how desperate we really are to feel valued and appreciated.  We often don’t share our real selves.  Actually, it is probably most of the time that we don’t share our real selves.

Why?  Because we are so afraid of being vulnerable.  We’re so scared of being judged. We’re so afraid of letting down the masked guard of perfection.  We don’t want to appear unintelligent or weak or unable to cope with all the demands of this modern world.  Our stories are sugar-coated with adjectives to try add some glitz and glamour to the daily grind of our nine to fives, to make the chaotic circus we arrive home to sound like a beautifully choreographed ballet (our children are all impeccably behaved angels, aren’t they?) or to make the fiery anger we sometimes feel, sound more like we were just mildly irritated.  Who are we kidding?  We are just creating a more stressful situation for ourselves.

We forget that we are supposed to be real.  We’re human and we are supposed to have emotions.  We’re supposed to make mistakes and feel let down and feel happy and sad and excited all at the same time.  We’re perfectly and wonderfully made.  We’re women. We forget that we are not alone in navigating this sea of life and all the ripples and waves that come with it.  If only we were courageous enough to make that connection, to share what is really going on in our hearts and minds.

We could learn from each other, support each other, teach and guide one another.  Being entirely, unreservedly honest with ourselves and being real in our conversations and actions with others can be liberating and inspiring and encouraging.  We could speak truth into each other’s lives instead of swimming around blindly trying to grasp on to anything that seems to keep us afloat.  If only we’d lower the guards for just a moment to allow for it to happen.

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