18 Dec Kings and queens
We celebrated the marriage of a dear friend of mine yesterday. She married a man she’s been praying for for years, a man who is perfect for her in every way. The union of two hearts who have so patiently and obediently waited for each other. The weather was absolutely perfect, the setting could not have been more beautiful and the atmosphere was just pure joy.
I’ve been to many weddings and heard many wedding sermons, but yesterday’s really struck a cord in my heart. The words were so simple and true and encouraging. One line in particular was so profound and it keeps going around and around in my head – “if you want to be treated like a queen, be sure to treat him like a king”. The minister also emphasised the vice versa.
So often, too often actually, I take out my irritation and frustrations and impatience on my amazing husband, when they have nothing to do with him at all. He listens to my moaning about picking up toys all day and feeling as though I don’t have a minute to myself, having to plan and prepare meals for five people and two dogs, my worries and stress of the continuous balancing act between family, work, us and me. So often, too often, he sees my worst side and it’s generally after he’s had a very long and stressful day himself. And still, after the moaning and groaning and sometimes the tears, I still expect to be treated like a queen. I feel it’s unfair for him to offload about all the things he has to deal with. I’m the one doing everything, am I not?
Reality hit home yesterday as I listened to the words of the wedding sermon. How can I expect to be treated with patience and love when he arrives home to a whining, nagging, dripping tap when he too has had to deal with and sort through a hundred different things since he left home that morning? How can I expect royal treatment when he is treated like far less than a king in those moments? The activities are different, but neither is more or less time consuming or stressful. Each of us deserve the best of each other.
Our role as husband and wife is to support and uplift each other, form a tightly bound duo. Lean on each other when times are hard and celebrate with each other through the joys of life. The small things should not worry us or distract us, our hearts should be released of the tension as our faith allows us to let go of those small things to see the bigger picture, to see the best in each other and the life around us. Those toys and meals and finding the balance are actually all signs of tremendous blessings in our lives.
I’ve been encouraged to see first the joys and to be the wife that brings out all the good in him. I’ve been encouraged to be the wife that supports, cares, praises and forgives. I’ve been encouraged to be the wife that treats him like a king, because I want to be treated like his queen.